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Thursday, December 29, 2011

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Assalamualaikum,
apa pun, aku doakan kau berjaya, dapat banggakan mak ayah kau.
Lupakanlah kita, or takpayah lupakan sebab tak pernah penting pun buat kau.
Aku tak pernah cuba untuk jadi kau.
But diri aku akan sentiasa ada Instant Smile when it comes to you.

Blog baru nie,
argh,
aku buat untuk,
lepaskan segala-galanya.
feel free to walk away from this page,


Every step that I took in my majestical daily life,
there's you in it.

I laminated your picture,
and turn it into a bookmark,
so that everytime I study,
You'll look at me.

Made a nametag with your name on it.
So that I could feel the confidence to get through another day.

I never bought a BB Torch,
sebab aku taknak kau kata aku tiru kau.

I never chose on buying A Myvi Extreme
sebab aku taknak kau kata aku tiru kau

I stopped my sister from buying an apartment at Pawana.
Sebab aku taknak kau ingat aku yang nak dekat dengan kau.

Life is hard for me.
Kau faham tak?

Kau keluarkan hati aku nie, basuh bersih2.
aku taknak simpan semua nie lagi dahla.

cukup lah nak dekat 5 tahun aku simpan nie semua.
AKU,
AKU,
AKU NAK LUPAKAN KAU,
tapi,
MACAMANA AKU NAK LUPAKAN KAU BILA KAU ORG PERTAMA YG ADA DALAM FIKIRAN AKU BILA AKU BANGUN TIDUR AND ORG TERAKHIR DLM FIKIRAN AKU BEFORE AKU TIDUR?

Bacalah nie.


Biar kau tahu. Aku seksa macam nie.
lepas apa aku buat pun,
yg aku dpt cuma:"Good"

HEY SOMEBODY IS DYING HERE BECAUSE OF YOU.

KEEP THAT IN MIND.

You won't cry over me kan?
TAKKAN.

aku kenal kau.


YES MEMANG KITA TAKKAN BOLEH BERSAMA.
but,
AKU TAHU KAU SIAPA.

Kau seorang yg suka, tp lama-lama jd benci.

unpredictable.

sekali lagi aku hanya mampu berkata-kata dlm blog ini.
Mustahil untuk berkata-kata dihadapan kau.

because why?

I would be the last person you ever want to meet on this earth.

Tears and fake smiles.

Sometimes, world is acting unfair for some of us.
bak kata dia:"Life is hard, why make it harder?"
yes it is hard. harder than anything trying to survive another day knowing that forever is not enough for me to wait for you.
I can't even get a single grip.
because I oftenly lose them.
I am not superhuman.
Crying while posting this?
do you have to ask that?
Have I never cried when it comes to you?

I miss everything,
I miss us.
I miss the moment when its all just about you and I.
editing pictures, late night chat,
2010 was the best.
But yeah,
Realizing that you're a Limited Edition human being,
makes me fight for you.
All I ever do all of this while is imagining us.
Living peacefully,
harmonily.
but Allah knows everything,
He knows the best for us.


I pray everyday, during my prayers, so that I can be your friend.
Just a friend.
Deleted my previous blog because yeah we usually fight through blogposts.
It hurts me more than anything again realizing until this moment all I ever meant to you is an unknown stranger bugging into your harmony and peaceful life.

I don't want to lose you nor hate you.
But being me,
needs a lot of courage and determination.
You said:"MOVE ON AIMAN! WE CAN NEVER BE TOGETHER!"
but WHERE DO I GO? WHERE WILL I BE WITHOUT YOU? WHAT WOULD I DO?
5 years. For someone that has a high level of intelligence you should know that it is not a short period of time.

Allahuakbar, syukur, Alhamdulillah, praise Allah.
I had supporting friends.
All I ever want is to get close to you!
at lest, I could show them,
GUYS! I CAN BE HAPPY! EVENTHOUGH I'M JUST A FRIEND TO THAT PERSON!
when my friends are giggling, I giggle with them. But the one that will accompany me after those giggles are the never-ending misery.

I know,
one day,
you'll read this, and feel annoyed.
Again,
you'll leave me,
without any news.
Hey!
I'm not suprised.
I keep on waiting.
and waiting,
to be a friend that you can chat and share stories with.

Whatever it is, I want to see you one day in heaven.
Take care,
Assalamualaikum.